HAPPY 1ST BIRTHDAY HEIDI NICOLE & NOAH EZEKIEL !!!!! MOMMY & DADDY LOVE AND MISS YOU BOTH SO MUCH!!!! WE HOPE YOU HAVE A GREAT DAY WITH MICAH, ALISON AND ALL OF OUR LOVED ONES WHO ARE WITH YOU!!!! GIVE THEM ALL OUR LOVE!!!!
I still think about and miss you 4 every second of every day. Although you were only with us for a few weeks, you changed and enriched our lives beyond words. We look forward to the day when we can hold you in our arms. You will always be our children and we will never forget you!!!!!
Tuesday, August 9, 2016
Thursday, June 23, 2016
Heavenly Father Is Writing Our Story
Since I was 16 years old, I had almost daily experiences with my then future children Micah, Alison (formally known as Rain), and twins Nicole (now known as Heidi Nicole) and Noah. There have been other children though that I have known that I called 'Spirit children'. They will be my children but would come to Kendall and I through other ways besides biological. These children may only be with Kendall and I for a few days, a few months or maybe years or a life time, but they have still been promised to me.
Now that Kendall and I are on the fostering and adopting path, it is time to meet these other children I have waited so long and so much for!!!! I know that Heavenly Father will lead us to where we need to be and that we will get the children we are meant to have, no matter how long they will be with us for.
I have to remember that Heavenly Father is writing our story and will be with us at every step. He will take us to the people and places we need to achieve the plans and promises He has for us. The aching need to be parents that Heavenly Father planted in the both of us when we were little. The VERY INTIMATE relationship I had with our future children (ALL of them). The LONG, AGONIZING trials we have had in our marriage, the loss of our children, the many moves, Kendall having a co-worker who happened to just start being a foster parent at the exact moment Kendall and I NEEDED another way to grow our family. Even Kendall having a life long dream of being in the Air Force (and me secretly always been wanting to be a military wife) and him actually working on it coming true. EVERY STEP has led us to getting these 'Spirit Children'. I KNOW that soon, Kendall and I will look back and realize all of the miracles that have happened in our lives, including the moments we felt our lives were shattered.
I have to remember that Heavenly Father is writing our story and will be with us at every step. He will take us to the people and places we need to achieve the plans and promises He has for us. The aching need to be parents that Heavenly Father planted in the both of us when we were little. The VERY INTIMATE relationship I had with our future children (ALL of them). The LONG, AGONIZING trials we have had in our marriage, the loss of our children, the many moves, Kendall having a co-worker who happened to just start being a foster parent at the exact moment Kendall and I NEEDED another way to grow our family. Even Kendall having a life long dream of being in the Air Force (and me secretly always been wanting to be a military wife) and him actually working on it coming true. EVERY STEP has led us to getting these 'Spirit Children'. I KNOW that soon, Kendall and I will look back and realize all of the miracles that have happened in our lives, including the moments we felt our lives were shattered.
LET THE CLASSES BEGIN!!!!
TODAY IS THE DAY!!!! Foster parenting classes (STARS) begin tonight at 6PM in Jefferson City. I am a bit nervous that Kendall will back out once he realizes what problems may arise with foster children and in the system. I just have to have faith that Heavenly Father is writing this story and it will happen just the way it is suppose too, including Kendall joining the Air Force.
Our caseworker, CB, came to our apartment on Monday. Things went great!!!! It was more of an introduction meeting, where we got to know each other a little bit. She talked to about what classes will be like (tonights class we will be given TONS of paperwork that we have to fill out) and she toured our apartment. She said that she wants to visit 2 more times before classes finish (on August 25th). I really liked CB and I feel a lot better knowing she is on our side and wants us to succeed.
I will update on how the first day of class went later in the week.
Our caseworker, CB, came to our apartment on Monday. Things went great!!!! It was more of an introduction meeting, where we got to know each other a little bit. She talked to about what classes will be like (tonights class we will be given TONS of paperwork that we have to fill out) and she toured our apartment. She said that she wants to visit 2 more times before classes finish (on August 25th). I really liked CB and I feel a lot better knowing she is on our side and wants us to succeed.
I will update on how the first day of class went later in the week.
Wednesday, June 8, 2016
A HUGE BOMBSHELL
On Monday night, Kendall and I were getting ready for bed when he drops a HUGE bombshell that will prevent us from fostering and adopting for probably at least one year, if not longer. HE IS GOING TO JOIN THE AIR FORCE in October. Both of his parents served in the Air Force for many years (his Dad was in it for 40 years). Kendall has ALWAYS DREAMED of going to military school and joining the Air Force, but several road blocks prevented him from joining.
Several weeks ago, Kendall was looking for available jobs in his field (his current job will probably be moving out of state soon). He came across a link for the Air Force and although thinking he was too old now to join, he decided to look into it. He found out that he had until he was 39 to enlist (he is 35 now). He became SO EXCITED at finding that out and knew instantly that that is what he was going to do. He thought long and hard about all of the pro's and con's but decided that the pro's outweighed the con's (I will write about them later).
He already thought about what this would do with our plans to foster and adopt and he is so sorry to put them on hold, but he feels like this is what is best for our family. We are still going to have the home inspection and take the classes but there won't be time to foster, let alone adopt. We both however whole heartedly agreed that signing up to foster and adopt will be our TOP priority when we arrive at our first state-side base.
Several weeks ago, Kendall was looking for available jobs in his field (his current job will probably be moving out of state soon). He came across a link for the Air Force and although thinking he was too old now to join, he decided to look into it. He found out that he had until he was 39 to enlist (he is 35 now). He became SO EXCITED at finding that out and knew instantly that that is what he was going to do. He thought long and hard about all of the pro's and con's but decided that the pro's outweighed the con's (I will write about them later).
He already thought about what this would do with our plans to foster and adopt and he is so sorry to put them on hold, but he feels like this is what is best for our family. We are still going to have the home inspection and take the classes but there won't be time to foster, let alone adopt. We both however whole heartedly agreed that signing up to foster and adopt will be our TOP priority when we arrive at our first state-side base.
Tuesday, June 7, 2016
It's about to start
I just got an e-mail from our caseworker, CB, at Great Circle. We have scheduled our home inspection for Monday June 13th at 4:30PM. Also, they have had to reschedule the STARS foster parenting classes for Thursday nights from June 23rd-August 25th (instead of the Monday nights they were scheduled). The classes will still be held from 6PM-9PM in Jefferson City.
I am SOOOO EXCITED and SOOOO SCARED!!!!! All I keep thinking about is that THIS MEETING is the ONE THING that will determine if I get to be a mother or not. If we pass with flying colors, we are set to be parents. If we fail, our chance to be parents comes to a complete stop and we will never get the chance ever again. Kendall and I's LIFE LONG DREAM, WISH, DESIRE will just end up as a living nightmare with a PHYSICAL, EMOTIONAL and SPIRITUAL ACHE THAT WON'T GO AWAY!!!
I just have to have to remember that CB is coming with an attitude that she WANTS us to pass!!! She WANTS to help us!!! She WANTS us to succeed!!! She is on OUR side!!! She is NOT an enemy looking for ways to fail us!!! Besides her, we have to remember that Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ are even MORE on our side then CB. If this is part of the plan They have for Kendall and I, we CAN NOT AND WILL NOT FAIL!!!!
I am SOOOO EXCITED and SOOOO SCARED!!!!! All I keep thinking about is that THIS MEETING is the ONE THING that will determine if I get to be a mother or not. If we pass with flying colors, we are set to be parents. If we fail, our chance to be parents comes to a complete stop and we will never get the chance ever again. Kendall and I's LIFE LONG DREAM, WISH, DESIRE will just end up as a living nightmare with a PHYSICAL, EMOTIONAL and SPIRITUAL ACHE THAT WON'T GO AWAY!!!
I just have to have to remember that CB is coming with an attitude that she WANTS us to pass!!! She WANTS to help us!!! She WANTS us to succeed!!! She is on OUR side!!! She is NOT an enemy looking for ways to fail us!!! Besides her, we have to remember that Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ are even MORE on our side then CB. If this is part of the plan They have for Kendall and I, we CAN NOT AND WILL NOT FAIL!!!!
Monday, May 30, 2016
Waiting
I turned in the initial set of paperwork for fostering a week ago and we have yet to hear back from the agency. Robin and I are on pins and needles waiting to hear back so we can start shopping for the nursery. Kendall is filled with doubt that we will pass inspection. He says that there are hundreds of reasons we could be denied for fostering and doesn't want to get his hopes up (we already have been let down 4 times when it comes to having children). I sure hope all of this waiting ends very soon, WITH GOOD NEWS!!!!
In the mean time, Robin and I continue to drool over the plans we have for the nursery. We had a snag where the crib was concerned (we had an almost impossible time finding a regular sized crib that converted into a twin bed) but last night I found one that does. Best of all Robin and I love the color, design AND price. We are both SOOOO HAPPY!!! This crib will work well with the Woodland Critters and outdoors theme we are doing. We now will have even more fun picking out crib sheets.
I did however buy one thing for our future kids, a baby carrier. I had already planned on baby wearing our biological kids so it was just natural that I continue the pan with our foster kids. I did quite a bit of research for baby carriers while I was pregnant with Micah and then continued it while there was a chance of biological children. I was debating between an Ergo 360 or a Lillebaby. I had never seen any of them in person before until last week when I found a Lilebaby in a baby boutique. I fell in LOVE with it and immediately went home to check on styles and designs. I once again came across a Lillebaby All Seasons print I loved and decided I had to have it. I spent hours looking online for a place that sold it and, thinking I would never find it again for sale, snagged it up. I am so excited for it to arrive. I will write about it again when it comes.
In the mean time, Robin and I continue to drool over the plans we have for the nursery. We had a snag where the crib was concerned (we had an almost impossible time finding a regular sized crib that converted into a twin bed) but last night I found one that does. Best of all Robin and I love the color, design AND price. We are both SOOOO HAPPY!!! This crib will work well with the Woodland Critters and outdoors theme we are doing. We now will have even more fun picking out crib sheets.
I did however buy one thing for our future kids, a baby carrier. I had already planned on baby wearing our biological kids so it was just natural that I continue the pan with our foster kids. I did quite a bit of research for baby carriers while I was pregnant with Micah and then continued it while there was a chance of biological children. I was debating between an Ergo 360 or a Lillebaby. I had never seen any of them in person before until last week when I found a Lilebaby in a baby boutique. I fell in LOVE with it and immediately went home to check on styles and designs. I once again came across a Lillebaby All Seasons print I loved and decided I had to have it. I spent hours looking online for a place that sold it and, thinking I would never find it again for sale, snagged it up. I am so excited for it to arrive. I will write about it again when it comes.
Monday, May 23, 2016
Things are falling into place!!!!
I'm SOOO EXCITED!!! Kendall and I have our first wave of paperwork all filled out for foster parenting and ready to be turned in first thing tomorrow morning. We needed to take a family picture in front of our apartment to turn in with the paperwork and we did that a few minutes a go. Foster parenting classes begin 5 weeks from tonight. Kendall and I decided we are going to foster infants and toddlers for now. We are also open to having 2 siblings and hopefully in the near future, we will be able to take up to 4 siblings.
Last night Kendall, Robin and I decided we are going to have a Woodlands Critter and outdoor theme for the nursery. Robin and I have been drooling over crib sheets and decor for the past 2 days. Robin and I also found a convertible crib that we all like on-line and will probably order it on Friday. It feels like things are finally falling into place and it will actually happen!!!!
Friday, May 13, 2016
We are signed up for class
Although Kendall and I are still working on getting the apartment ready for the home inspection and I am still working on the paperwork, we are signed up to take the STAR Fostering classes beginning June 20th. The classes are every Monday (except July 4th) from 6PM-9PM in Jefferson City (about 30minutes away) from June 20th until August 23rd. We are really excited!!!!
Sunday, April 10, 2016
Being a Mommy is out of my hands now
Today my stress and worry about fostering and adoption has been sky high. I keep fretting that our opportunity to be parents aren't in our hands, that other people get to decide if I get to be a Mommy!!! Our 3 references have to tell the agency so much about us. Are they going to say too little? Are they going to say too much? Are they going to say too many bad things????
If we do end up passing with our references, we still have to make a good enough impressions with our home study and other paperwork. Although being a Mommy is ALL I HAVE EVER WANTED since I was 4 years old, I just don't feel confident that a stranger will think I will be a good Mommy.
I just pray that Heavenly Father will allow me to be comforted, confident and be ok. I just REALLY hope that things work out and Kendall and I FINALLY get to be parents to children we hold in our arms!!!!
If we do end up passing with our references, we still have to make a good enough impressions with our home study and other paperwork. Although being a Mommy is ALL I HAVE EVER WANTED since I was 4 years old, I just don't feel confident that a stranger will think I will be a good Mommy.
I just pray that Heavenly Father will allow me to be comforted, confident and be ok. I just REALLY hope that things work out and Kendall and I FINALLY get to be parents to children we hold in our arms!!!!
Saturday, April 9, 2016
Deciding to foster and adopt
As I mentioned in the previous post, Kendall and I have lost 4 children during pregnancy. We lost Micah at 24weeks in February 2014, Allison at 6weeks in May 2014 and twins Heidi&Noah at 8weeks in August 2015. After the loss of Heidi and Noah, it was discovered that I have an abnormality in my uterus that was causing these losses. Although this abnormality is easy to fix with a simple and fast surgery, Kendall and I felt that Heavenly Father did not want us to get the surgery and that He wanted us to foster and adopt.
Kendall and I talked quite a bit about fostering and adopting on Thursday (4/7/16) and made the decision yesterday (4/8/16) to start paperwork with an agency. One of Kendall's co-works and his wife just became foster parents with an agency here in Columbia called Great Circle and had their first placement on Monday. I called Great Circle up yesterday morning and was e-mailed the application. Kendall and I told Robin about our plans and began filling out the paperwork. We called our families last night and told them and they are all so excited and happy for us. We announced it to everyone else this morning and also received very positive responses.
After we complete the paperwork and turn it in, we will be given a caseworker and have a home study. Once we pass the home study, we will have 9 weeks of training and then we will be foster parents. When the time comes for adoption, we will have to take more training. We are open to get one single child (any age) or a sibling set with 2 or maybe 3 children. Kendall and I are SO VERY EXCITED to FINALLY have the opportunity to have children in our arms!!!! We know it will be very difficult with lots of ups, downs, tears and smiles, but we know everything will be worth it in the end!!!!
Kendall and I talked quite a bit about fostering and adopting on Thursday (4/7/16) and made the decision yesterday (4/8/16) to start paperwork with an agency. One of Kendall's co-works and his wife just became foster parents with an agency here in Columbia called Great Circle and had their first placement on Monday. I called Great Circle up yesterday morning and was e-mailed the application. Kendall and I told Robin about our plans and began filling out the paperwork. We called our families last night and told them and they are all so excited and happy for us. We announced it to everyone else this morning and also received very positive responses.
After we complete the paperwork and turn it in, we will be given a caseworker and have a home study. Once we pass the home study, we will have 9 weeks of training and then we will be foster parents. When the time comes for adoption, we will have to take more training. We are open to get one single child (any age) or a sibling set with 2 or maybe 3 children. Kendall and I are SO VERY EXCITED to FINALLY have the opportunity to have children in our arms!!!! We know it will be very difficult with lots of ups, downs, tears and smiles, but we know everything will be worth it in the end!!!!
Catching Up and Our 4 Angels
I am so sorry that I haven't written on this blog since I started it. I was so busy with life that I didn't have time to write on it and then I just forgot all about it. I will do my best to catch you all up on what has been going on the past 31/2 years.
Kendall and I did get married at the Los Angeles LDS Temple on September 8, 2012. It was a day filled with so many highs and lows but everything was worth it in the end. The day after our wedding, Kendall started our drive to our honeymoon in Arkansas while Kendall's family drove all of my stuff to my new home in Missouri. Kendall's family asked Robin (my twin sister and VERY BEST FRIEND) to tag along with them. Robin was suppose to stay for only a few days, but except for a 4 month stint back in California to get her affairs in order, she has remained in Missouri to this day.
Kendall and I had an amazing honeymoon at DeGray Lake in Arkansas. After our honeymoon, we drove to my new home in Saint Joseph (St.Joe) Missouri. The first couple weeks of our marriage went pretty smoothly and we were settling in wonderfully. Without warning though, 3 weeks into our marriage, Kendall comes home from work early with the news that he had just been laid off and he didn't have a job anymore. We spent the next 3 months in complete stress trying to find a new job. Kendall spent HOURS, DAYS, WEEKS, MONTHS trying to find a job in St. Joe and surrounding areas. Kendall still owned the house we were living in so we wanted a job where we wouldn't have to move.
Unfortunately the only job Kendall was able to find was working as a computer programmer for the Kansas State Department of Education in Topeka, Kansas. We had to move 90 minutes away from St. Joe and lived in a small barn that had been converted into an apartment. The 'apartment' was about 30 minutes north of Topeka on a gravel road. Through many experiences, Kendall and I ended up HATING Kansas, Topeka, Kendall's job and his work environment. After a full year of living in Topeka, we even went back to living in St Joe for a year and Kendall just commuting the 90 minutes one way to work, just to get get away from Kansas as much as possible. It ended up not working out, so we had to move back to Topeka for another year until Kendall could find another job away from Kansas.
While we were living in Kansas the first time, we found out I was pregnant. Kendall and I were SOOOOOO HAPPY!!!! We both have been waiting to be parents as long as we could remember and were ECSTATIC to finally have our wish come true. Even though I had REALLY BAD morning sickness, I was still so happy for the little baby growing inside me and couldn't wait for him or her to come. We found out it was a boy when I was 21 weeks along and already had the name Micah Stanley picked out for him. Tragically, Micah's heart stopped when I was 24weeks along and he was born still on February 6, 2014, just 2 days before my 34th birthday. He was born at 9:56 AM and was 12 inches long and weighed 1lb4.6oz. Although he wasn't filled out as full term baby, Micah was SO HANDSOME to me. He had cute ears, an adorable button nose, gorgeous dark blue eyes, BLINDING blonde hair, and 10 tiny fingers and toes.
Kendall and I were devastated!!!! We couldn't believe our little boy was gone. We had so many wishes and plans for Micah and our future but they all came to an end with the stopping of his heart. I can't put into words what those many days, weeks and months were like for us after Micah left. They were dark, lonely and stormy. We were so lost and we felt so alone.
Things started to get better after about 3 months after Micah passed away. Our lives weren't as dark and we felt a great need to have another baby. Kendall and I found out I was pregnant again on Mothers Day (May 11th) 2014. We were once again so happy!!!! We couldn't believe that we were given another opportunity to become parents and hopefully this time, this Rainbow Baby would make it into our arms. "A Rainbow Baby is a baby born after a loss of a child. It is understood that the beauty of a rainbow does not negate the ravages of any storm. When a rainbow appears, it does not mean the storm never happened or that we are not still dealing with it's aftermath. It means something beautiful and full of light has appeared in the midst of darkness and clouds. Storm clouds may still hover, but the rainbow provides counterbalance of color, energy and hope." Sadly once again, we lost this baby too, Allison Rain at 5weeks3days on May 21, 2014, on the 31/2 month mark of losing Micah.
Life went on after losing Allison. We had to move back to Topeka for a year while Kendall tried desperately to find another job. He looked everywhere in the country but couldn't find anything. He had many prospects and interviews with companies in Montana, Colorado, Louisiana, Texas, an other places but we never heard back from them when it came to the final interview.
After taking a full year off from trying to conceive (TTC), I became pregnant again, this time with twins, Heidi Nicole and Noah Ezekiel. Tragically, once again, we lost them at 7weeks6day. I had been heavily bleeding since 5weeks but I had 2 ultrasounds that showed the twins were doing ok, although they were measuring small. Sadly though I passed Heidi on August 9, 2015. Another ultrasound the following day showed Noah was still inside me but his heart had stopped.
Once again, we were devastated that we had lost 2 more children. We couldn't believe that we now were the parents of 4 Angels but still had no children in our arms. I went to several doctors to find out why I was losing our children. After many months, it was discovered that I have an abnormal uterus called Septate Uterus. A thick wall of bloodless tissue divides my uterus in 2 parts. This abnormality causes early miscarriage if the baby attaches to this wall because the baby won't get the blood and nutrients the baby needs to survive and grow. It causes still-birth (Micah) because the baby has less room to grow with the wall dividing the uterus.
Two months after losing Heidi and Noah, Kendall finally found a new job working as a computer programmer for a bio-research company named IDEXX. Kendall really likes his job, work environment and co-workers. Robin came along with Kendall and I when we moved and the 3 of us are LOVING Columbia!!!! There is SO MUCH to do here and a fantastic mix of nature and city life. Columbia is BEAUTIFUL and the people and culture here is FANTASTIC!!!! I could gladly live in Columbia for the rest of my life. I will make another post soon about all the reasons WE HEART CoMo!!!!!
Kendall and I did get married at the Los Angeles LDS Temple on September 8, 2012. It was a day filled with so many highs and lows but everything was worth it in the end. The day after our wedding, Kendall started our drive to our honeymoon in Arkansas while Kendall's family drove all of my stuff to my new home in Missouri. Kendall's family asked Robin (my twin sister and VERY BEST FRIEND) to tag along with them. Robin was suppose to stay for only a few days, but except for a 4 month stint back in California to get her affairs in order, she has remained in Missouri to this day.
Kendall and I had an amazing honeymoon at DeGray Lake in Arkansas. After our honeymoon, we drove to my new home in Saint Joseph (St.Joe) Missouri. The first couple weeks of our marriage went pretty smoothly and we were settling in wonderfully. Without warning though, 3 weeks into our marriage, Kendall comes home from work early with the news that he had just been laid off and he didn't have a job anymore. We spent the next 3 months in complete stress trying to find a new job. Kendall spent HOURS, DAYS, WEEKS, MONTHS trying to find a job in St. Joe and surrounding areas. Kendall still owned the house we were living in so we wanted a job where we wouldn't have to move.
Unfortunately the only job Kendall was able to find was working as a computer programmer for the Kansas State Department of Education in Topeka, Kansas. We had to move 90 minutes away from St. Joe and lived in a small barn that had been converted into an apartment. The 'apartment' was about 30 minutes north of Topeka on a gravel road. Through many experiences, Kendall and I ended up HATING Kansas, Topeka, Kendall's job and his work environment. After a full year of living in Topeka, we even went back to living in St Joe for a year and Kendall just commuting the 90 minutes one way to work, just to get get away from Kansas as much as possible. It ended up not working out, so we had to move back to Topeka for another year until Kendall could find another job away from Kansas.
While we were living in Kansas the first time, we found out I was pregnant. Kendall and I were SOOOOOO HAPPY!!!! We both have been waiting to be parents as long as we could remember and were ECSTATIC to finally have our wish come true. Even though I had REALLY BAD morning sickness, I was still so happy for the little baby growing inside me and couldn't wait for him or her to come. We found out it was a boy when I was 21 weeks along and already had the name Micah Stanley picked out for him. Tragically, Micah's heart stopped when I was 24weeks along and he was born still on February 6, 2014, just 2 days before my 34th birthday. He was born at 9:56 AM and was 12 inches long and weighed 1lb4.6oz. Although he wasn't filled out as full term baby, Micah was SO HANDSOME to me. He had cute ears, an adorable button nose, gorgeous dark blue eyes, BLINDING blonde hair, and 10 tiny fingers and toes.
Kendall and I were devastated!!!! We couldn't believe our little boy was gone. We had so many wishes and plans for Micah and our future but they all came to an end with the stopping of his heart. I can't put into words what those many days, weeks and months were like for us after Micah left. They were dark, lonely and stormy. We were so lost and we felt so alone.
Things started to get better after about 3 months after Micah passed away. Our lives weren't as dark and we felt a great need to have another baby. Kendall and I found out I was pregnant again on Mothers Day (May 11th) 2014. We were once again so happy!!!! We couldn't believe that we were given another opportunity to become parents and hopefully this time, this Rainbow Baby would make it into our arms. "A Rainbow Baby is a baby born after a loss of a child. It is understood that the beauty of a rainbow does not negate the ravages of any storm. When a rainbow appears, it does not mean the storm never happened or that we are not still dealing with it's aftermath. It means something beautiful and full of light has appeared in the midst of darkness and clouds. Storm clouds may still hover, but the rainbow provides counterbalance of color, energy and hope." Sadly once again, we lost this baby too, Allison Rain at 5weeks3days on May 21, 2014, on the 31/2 month mark of losing Micah.
Life went on after losing Allison. We had to move back to Topeka for a year while Kendall tried desperately to find another job. He looked everywhere in the country but couldn't find anything. He had many prospects and interviews with companies in Montana, Colorado, Louisiana, Texas, an other places but we never heard back from them when it came to the final interview.
After taking a full year off from trying to conceive (TTC), I became pregnant again, this time with twins, Heidi Nicole and Noah Ezekiel. Tragically, once again, we lost them at 7weeks6day. I had been heavily bleeding since 5weeks but I had 2 ultrasounds that showed the twins were doing ok, although they were measuring small. Sadly though I passed Heidi on August 9, 2015. Another ultrasound the following day showed Noah was still inside me but his heart had stopped.
Once again, we were devastated that we had lost 2 more children. We couldn't believe that we now were the parents of 4 Angels but still had no children in our arms. I went to several doctors to find out why I was losing our children. After many months, it was discovered that I have an abnormal uterus called Septate Uterus. A thick wall of bloodless tissue divides my uterus in 2 parts. This abnormality causes early miscarriage if the baby attaches to this wall because the baby won't get the blood and nutrients the baby needs to survive and grow. It causes still-birth (Micah) because the baby has less room to grow with the wall dividing the uterus.
Two months after losing Heidi and Noah, Kendall finally found a new job working as a computer programmer for a bio-research company named IDEXX. Kendall really likes his job, work environment and co-workers. Robin came along with Kendall and I when we moved and the 3 of us are LOVING Columbia!!!! There is SO MUCH to do here and a fantastic mix of nature and city life. Columbia is BEAUTIFUL and the people and culture here is FANTASTIC!!!! I could gladly live in Columbia for the rest of my life. I will make another post soon about all the reasons WE HEART CoMo!!!!!
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